Activate
You’re here because you care about fighting antisemitism and other forms of prejudice. You might be doing this for the first time, or you might have marched for Civil Rights in the 1960s or protested in support of Soviet Jews in the 1980s. Wherever you are on your journey of activism, we’re glad you’re here.
The Project Menorah family knows that, even when we want to help, we don’t always know how. We might think, “How do I say something firm but respectful?”, “Is it my place to speak up?”, or even, “Did they just say what I think they did? No way, I must have misheard.”
This page will offer tools for responding to everyday prejudice, bias and stereotypes.
Like all of our resources, this page will be updated with new ideas and strategies. Follow us to be the first to receive them.
How To Speak Out
When You Witness Bias or Bigotry
It happened. You heard something. You saw something. And you know it’s wrong. What do you do? Below are 5 Steps to help you speak up against bias and bigotry.
Be Prepared
One thing is certain, you will encounter bias. It may be against you, someone you care about, or a complete stranger. So, be ready. Tell yourself now, “I am someone who speaks up. I have the courage to do what’s right.” Promise yourself that you won’t be silent.
In every situation, assess your safety, both physical and emotional. There is a risk, and that must be acknowledged as you make your own choice to speak up. And also think about how you will feel if you don’t speak up. Giving thought to all of this ahead of time will help you to be ready when the moment comes.
Interrupt
When you hear someone say something bigoted or biased, and you’ve decided to speak up, the first step is to INTERRUPT them. Stop them in their tracks. You could say, “Hold on, I need to stop you” or “Wait, that offends me” or “Stop. I don’t think that’s funny.” My go-to Interruption is, “Woah Woah Woah.” Think about what might work for you and have it locked and loaded.
You don’t need to yell, or be angry, or even have a judgmental tone. You just need to clearly and assertively stop them. In many cases, you want to navigate the situation in a way that offers the offending party a chance to back down and learn from their mistake. Of course, there will be times when that’s not the case, and then your goal will be to let the offender and any bystanders know this behavior is unacceptable and you won’t tolerate it.
Ask a Question
The offending speaker may not know they said something problematic. Ask them a simple question like, “What did you mean by that?” It will require them to stop and think about it. They might then realize they said something offensive and it will give them a chance to unwind it. They might also double down on their position.
In any case, asking a question will put some of the burden of the interaction back on the speaker. It will also give you clearer insight into their position, and importantly, a few seconds to compose your thoughts.
Educate
Hate isn’t behind all hateful speech. Sometimes, it’s just ignorance or a lack of exposure to diverse populations. If this is the first time you’ve heard this person say the offending thing, try to educate them. Explain why their comment is offensive or factually wrong. Be kind but firm. Give them some grace and an opportunity to learn and become an ally.
And also… it’s not your job to educate everyone. If this behavior is a pattern or clearly meant to harm, then use this step to educate the bystanders who might be watching the interaction.
Echo
While being the first person to interrupt hate speech or bias is vital, so is being second, third, or fourth. If you witness someone have the courage to speak out, echo what they’ve said. Show the interrupter that you have their back and show the offender that their comments aren’t acceptable to lots of people.
An Echo could be as simple as, “I agree, that’s an offensive thing to say.” If it’s a situation where the offender seems open to the conversation, you could add some Education to that like, “…and here’s why…” Remember to stay kind, with the goal of creating another ally.
But if the offender has doubled-down on their hateful position, your Echo won’t be about educating them. In this case, it will serve to show the offender and all bystanders that the Good People aren’t afraid to speak up and push back.
REMEMBER:
You don’t need perfect words. Just start talking.
Be respectful but firm.
Be ready for a lack of closure. Sometimes, they’ll get it. Sometimes they won’t. The victory is that you Interrupted! If you can change hearts and minds, that’s a bonus.
EXAMPLE ONE
TONY: “Ask Scott to pay for lunch. He’s Jewish. He’s got lots of money.”
SUSAN: “Woah, woah, woah. I gotta stop you. What do you mean by that?”
TONY: “Chill out. It’s a compliment. He’s Jewish so he’s probably rich.”
SUSAN: “Tony, that’s a really offensive thing to say. Jewish people are like everyone else. Some are rich, some or poor. Assumptions like that are really hurtful, even in jest.
MALIK: “I agree with Susan. It’s not cool to play into stereotypes like that.”
TONY: “Sorry, guys. I didn’t mean to be hurtful. Thanks for walking me through that.
EXAMPLE TWO
LARA: “That car dealer tried to Jew me down on the price of the car that I—”
MARCO: “Woah! That’s an offensive term. What do you mean by that?”
LARA: “It’s not offensive, it just means to haggle.”
MARCO: “No. It’s mean and plays into ugly stereotypes about Jewish people.”
LARA: “So what? Are you Jewish? No Jews even work in our department.”
JANA: “Lara, stop. It doesn’t matter. What you are saying is hurtful and we won’t put up with it. I’m reporting you to H.R.”
Lara storms off.
A special thank you to the Southern Poverty Law Center, upon whose work I relied heavily for this section.
